The drop was roughly one hundred feet. I looked straight down and my stomach seemed to spiral endlessly as I calculated how far my head would go into the Earth if I did a nose-dive. If my calculations were correct, It'd have been about a half of a foot, depending on how much air resistance slowed me down and how hard and moist the ground was. My legs would be sticking straight up in the air, pointing to the sky. The wild animals would eat the flesh and meat off of my decaying body which would only leave a pile of bones for the archaeologists of the future to dig up and carbon date. They'd be able to tell what time period I lived in, but nothing more than that.
They wouldn't know what my struggles were, what I liked and didn't like, or even how I died, how I killed myself, and why. Hell, even I didn't know why. Why not? There was no one here to tell me "You've got everything to live for. Don't jump. Your family needs you". It was just me and mother nature out here in a battle of will that I was losing terribly.
And maybe that's why I didn't jump. There was no rebellion. There was no point to prove. I wasn't dying to show someone how wrong they were about me. There would be no sympathy at a funeral packed with people that thought I was weird while I was alive but for some reason realized how great of a person I was after I died. I had no reason to jump but because I was dying, and I was alone.
And that's when she came, and destroyed every part of the mentality I was previously stuck on. She shattered me.
She saved me.
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